Epic, legendary, Rickdiculous. Some words that would describe my Friday night with Jeff. Jeff and I went to Parkway Bingo at the Fox Hollow Retirement Center and played bingo on Friday night. Let me paint the picture for you, you pull up to a dirt parking lot and the building has no windows and the door is a foot thick piece of wood. You walk in and see some of the oldest people you will ever see in your life. Jeff and I were the youngest people in the room by at least 20 years to the next youngest people, it is mostly people who are over 50 and there are some people who look like they could be 100. We went to the front counter and bought $10 worth of bingo cards and sat in the "blue room", which is a non-smoking room that fits like 25 people. The main room had at least 200 people in it and that was the smoking area. We started playing the first game which was a "line plus two corners" game which means you have to get five in a row and two corner spots to win. I had three spots left to fill and I got all three in a row and won, the payout was $150. Not only that, but because I was the first male to win I got to be king for the night. The king gets to wear a crown and I got to pick a number (11) and every time the number was drawn and I honked this horn that I got, I got a dollar. Some old lady came up and took my I.D. and left the room and came back 15 minutes later and gave me $150 in cash, Jeff and I laughed hysterically and said stuff like "we're gettin' paid" and "gotsta get that paper." We continued to play and kept getting dollar bills so we kept buying more cards to play on. Then a game came up where we had to get an "X", which is exactly what it sounds like. I got down to the point where I only needed one more spot and Jeff and I started laughing again and talking about how mad the old people would get if we won again. Then the caller called out my number and the payout was $200, but I had to split it with some other lady that won on the same ball. Then we bought cards for the "latenight" game which is a blackout and the payout is $1000. Jeff and I kept talking about how funny it would be if we won $1000, but we didn't really think it would happen. Jeff got down to the point where he only had one number left and we were freaking out and on the very next pull some old, old lady yells out "bingo" and kills our dreams. Jeff and I left $261 richer than when we came (we agreed before that if either of us won then we would split it). If that isn't legendary than I don't know what is.